How to Tell if Your Family Is Cursed

Practice you always wonder what someone would think if they saw the items in your purse? If yous looked in my purse correct now, you would notice a flower vase, hand-sanitizer, a hair-bow, a protective face mask, an old glow stick, a pen, a tape measure, lotion, Zyrtec, a marker, a flashlight, and a microfiber cleaning cloth.

While random, each of these items is there for a reason: The mask, hand-sanitizer, and Zyrtec are in there to keep me safe, the flower vase is a souvenir and the tape measurer is for a project I am working on.

The items in my handbag are not directly related to my love life or yours. Nevertheless, taking a look at our lives and what we deport effectually (physically and metaphorically), reveals a lot about who we are and the bear upon this baggage can have on our relationships.

What is a Generational Curse?

According to The Gospel Coalition, a "generational curse describes the cumulative issue on a person of things that their ancestors did, believed, or practiced in the by, and a consequence of an ancestor's actions, behavior, and sins existence passed downwardly."

Our families' history and baggage impacts who we are as people, whether we similar it or non. You may consider your family unit a blessing or consider them a brunt considering of the long history of negative traits they've passed downward.

An case of a generational curse is divorce. Your parents grew upward in homes with divorced parents, so they both lacked a clear film of what a healthy relationship looks like. With this negative case, your parents developed unhealthy relationship habits and passed those on to y'all. You lot might be afraid of commitment because you are afraid of passing down the same trauma or hurting that you lot experienced every bit a child to your own children. And this fear of commitment may preclude yous from experiencing the gift and liberty found in authentic love.

Breaking a Generational Curse

While your family history has an effect on you, you are not bound by these generational curses.

Y'all accept the option to go along in the footsteps of your ancestors and pass on these curses to your children, or with groovy diligence, you can end those curses over your life and future. You lot get to decide if the generational curse continues or ends.

There is great freedom in breaking a generational expletive and creating a healthier relationship for yourself, the people you love, and the generations to follow.

Start With The Genogram Exercise

Recognizing a generational curse is the outset step in the fight to terminate it.

In his volume, Emotionally Salubrious Spirituality, Peter Scazzero shares an exercise chosen a genogram. This exercise helps place generational sin and its touch on on an individual.

Genograms can be freeing because they show that you're not the only i in your family who has struggled with specific things. Information technology's designed to bring low-cal to the darkness of generational curses and help you walk forward in the light. It'll help you understand how your family'southward behavior impacts your relationships with your significant other, friends, or relatives.

Draw Your Family Tree

In that location are a lot of means to complete a genogram. You tin can adapt information technology to your comfort level and needs. It can look complicated at showtime simply don't lose sight of the big flick–to find generational behaviors that accept been passed downwards to yous.

Offset, beginning by drawing a family tree and include three-4 generations if you can. This is y'all, your parents, your grandparents, and your great-grandparents. You tin can also include the siblings, spouses, and long-term significant others within each generation.

Ask Questions

In one case you take your family tree, start gathering data using the questions listed below:

1. Were yous impacted by a divorce, separation or affair?
2. Accept you ever lived with a significant other who you weren't married to?
three. Were you impacted by the corruption of drugs or alcohol?
4. Were y'all impacted by someone else'due south mental illness or your own?
5. Did you lot experience any kind of physical or emotional abuse?
6. Have you experienced the decease of someone shut to you, including a miscarriage or suicide?
7. Did yous have cancer or serious health conditions?
eight. Have you had an abortion?
9. What is your relationship to money?
10. Did anyone ever tell you they were proud of you lot?
11. What is your greatest fearfulness?
12. Were your parents present?
13. Do you have long-term friends?
14. Did your family always foster a child?
15. Were yous ever in foster care?
xvi. Are you a twin?
17. Did your family ever adopt a child?
xviii. Did you ever put a child upward for adoption?
19. Did your family unit run a business?
20. Are you a veteran of war?

These questions are simply suggestions, and then conform them in guild to uncover details you retrieve are about helpful.

Once you lot take a list of questions, start by filling out the answers you lot know. There is not a right or wrong way to do this, and so choose a method that makes the near sense for you. One time yous've written downwardly the data you already know, call your relatives to enquire for answers to the remaining questions.

Information technology isn't necessary to speak with everyone on the tree, just talk to every bit many people equally possible and then you can better empathise who they are and their beliefs patterns. The more than information you take, the more you'll understand trends and generational curses that have impacted you.

Be Patient

Keep in mind as you exercise the genogram exercise, many more than things may come up to the light than you lot expected—and then exist patient with yourself and your family. This process tin be healing, simply earlier y'all can break those curses, you may suffer a period of grief or fifty-fifty anger because of the brokenness in your family. This is normal and natural. Only call up that no family unit is perfect, and in that location are families hiding much more difficult truths than the ones y'all find virtually yours.

Talk With Your Loved Ones

Breaking a generational expletive will take a lot of work, but it's worth it. Once you lot have a better understanding of your family unit history, evaluate how those life events impacted you indirectly or straight and accept honest conversations with the people yous are closest with.

Peradventure you're in a committed relationship, accept a group of close friends, or have children–whatsoever your circle looks similar, be open up nearly the curses you've uncovered. Let your community come up around yous to listen and help you process your emotions, and invite them to keep yous accountable to breaking bad habits and curses in your life.

Hearing from you will give them more context for some of the habits you struggle with. Maybe you struggle with anger or trust problems—any it is, your loved ones volition be more inclined to offer grace and patience as y'all process through your family history and work to end those curses.

Begin The Healing Journey

But talking with your loved ones is merely the get-go. You're now on a long but wonderful journeying toward a improve time to come for yourself and your family:

Reverberate

Reverberate on the existing generational curses in your life; how exercise they manifest in you lot and your family unit?

Investigate

Investigate your ain life; exercise your behaviors reverberate bad patterns? What destructive deportment have you learned from older generations in your family unit?

Identify

Identify the means you want your life and behaviors to be different.

Track Change

Use a whiteboard or journal and track your feelings and changes 24-hour interval by day or calendar week by week.

Pray

Pray for the forcefulness to fight ingrained habits.

Celebrate

Celebrate successes every bit yous transition away from generational curses.

Seek Support

Finally, don't practice information technology alone—seek the support of a advisor.

Mayhap it isn't mutual in your family or friend circle to seek counseling, only we encourage you to find a licensed professional counselor who you feel comfy opening up with. A counselor tin assist y'all process your thoughts and emotions in a healthy fashion and aid you place generational curses manifesting in your life. Thankfully, there are professionals available to fit every person, budget, and schedule.

The Source has licensed professional person counselors at each of our women's wellness clinics, as well as medical professionals available to aid you if yous take an unplanned pregnancy or need an STI examination.

Click the button below to request a 30-minute appointment with The Source today!

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Source: https://www.thesource.org/post/generational-curses-affect-my-love-life